Update On Everything Diva, Including Horny-ness, F*ckery & Everything In Between (1 of 2)

Ok, so I know I've been MIA, and now here I am, trying to play catch-up, fill-in & fill-up. So let me start with a few disclaimers. As usual, I'm drinking. So if something doesn't make since, blame the Yellowtail Shiraz (hey, good cheap wine, what can I say). Disclaimer #2, I haven't had sex in like 2 months...so everything reeks of sexual tension. I'm scared I'll throw my panties at some random guy on the street anyday now, although I must say, I've been in some hard situations the last month (all puns intended), and didn't give in....so maybe the horny-ness is a mental thing.

First things first. I remember I told you I was going to tell you about the break-up with Klein. Hopefully to clear up the fact that I'm not a bitch for breaking up with him shortly after his mom passed. Here goes...

So in the comments awhile ago, I indicated my rocking, eccentric Aunt passed away shortly after Klein's mom. In fact, we were together when I got the news that she had hours (if that) to live. Klein & I talked about her & we talked about his mom, life, blah, blah, blah. So we depart, and on my long drive home, she passes. I call him to let him know. He doesn't answer. A few hours later he calls me & tells me he's out & will call me later.

Later ends up being the next day or so. I had to call him because his phone was off...so I let him know I'm going home for her funeral over the weekend (it's like Monday evening at this point). He's still out of town at this point & says he doesn't know when he'll be back, he has family stuff to take care of. Well he gets back in town Wednesday (but he doesn't tell me, I found out via his sister early Thursday morning, after she sent me a text asking me if I spoke to him). We talked Thursday evening.

I left Friday morning for the funeral.

I leave on Friday & not once does he:
1) call me to see if I made it home ok
2) check on me to see how my fam is doing with everything
3) check on me to see how I am doing
4) see when I'll be back, call to say he misses me, or and fuckery of that nature.

I get back to D.C. on Sunday evening & call to let him know I'm back. No answer. I go about my day, head to the store, with the intentions of going home to unpack & re-pack for my trip to paradise in the form of Jamaica that takes place 3 days later. Low & behold I'm in the check-out line and guess who comes in??? Klein.

He comes up to me (I didn't notice him or rather see him walk in) and asks me to wait for him while he checks out.

I wait.

He comes out & acts like everything is right with the world. The first thing he says to me is:

"I got into a fight last night at work"

Me: *blank stare*

(in my head: WHAT THE FUCK, I DON'T CARE)

Me: (outloud): Ummm excuse me. Did you get my text from earlier?

Him: Yeah, about you making it back?

Me: Um Yeah.

Him: Yeah, I was gonna call you. But guess what happened to me last night?

Me: I don't care. Before you tell me anything, you haven't even asked me how my flight was, how's my family, how was my trip. In fact, you didn't call me once this whole weekend!!!


Ok, sorry guys, I'm getting mad just thinking about the pure fuckery that came out his mouth afterwards. To be continued...

But In Other News:

I resisted the temptation that is Mr. H for the last month, and the fact that he's been throwing it at me like a major league pitcher...

Remember Jason??? If you don't you gotta catch up on him, he's sorta back in the picture as a "friend only".

School has me busy as well as work, so I've been a REALLY GOOD DIVA. As you can see, I'm in the house...but the night is still young.

In 3 Nutshells...or More (Part 1)

With the impending snowstorm, that everyone is freaking out about, I’ll probably have plenty of time this weekend to work on my grad school applications (one of a few reasons why I was M.I.A). So today, I decided to begin catching you up, on everything that’s happened in the last month or so....

Mr. Henry

So remember awhile ago, when I mentioned how Mr. H was being a pansy, and pain in my ass, re not shoveling snow, blah, blah, catch up here. Well he called me about three times after our falling out. Each time he talked to me as if nothing happened. NOTHING. Each time, I reminded him about his bitch-assness, and that I was still pissed. The last time he called me was a week after my birthday. Again, carrying on like we haven’t stopped talking.

Mr. Henry: Hey how are you cutie? ....(blah, blah, blah) So I was just calling to check on you, to see how you’re doing...

Me: I’m good, but you should have thought of that a week ago (bastard...ok, I didn’t say bastard, but I thought it.) on my birthday

Mr. Henry: Oh, happy b-lated birthday, how was it. What did you do?

Me: It was really good. Look, I gotta go, thanks for calling. Bye.



And then I hit "delete number".



Jason

I had high hopes for Jason. I mean how many times can one go to the movies and hold hands? And, I don’t just hold hands with any “tom, dick, or harry”. Like seriously. wtf was up? So I had a little impromptu birthday celebration with about 12 or so friends. Jason made an appearance. So things were casual. Mingling, small talk. By the time happy hour was over the group died down, and it was about six of us left. Jason left because he said he had class. Cool. He sends me a text to ask where we are headed after we left the bar. I responded with our plans to go down the street to a salsa/hip hop bar. He responds that he’ll stop by after class. Halfway through salsa dancing, I get a text that he couldn’t make it. Admittedly I was a little bummed, but I was having such a good-time, he ended up becoming an after-thought.
The next day he sends me text, that was extremely odd, and threw me off....


Jason’s Text: “So did you get broke off by your boo, lot’s of birthday gifts, and love every minute of it, lol”

WTF???...to be continued...

Signs of Stalkery Crazy People - Do Not Answer

6 Signs of Crazy ---- (This means you Brooklyn)



1. If he/she calls you four times in one day: Brooklyn called me four times yesterday. The first two times I was out & about & didn’t answer. I called him back to see what he wanted. He was just calling to say “hey” he said & to see if I wanted to meet up because he was in the area. After explaining to him that I was hanging with the chick friends, and then will be out of town, he was like “Oh”. Fast-forward about five hours later. Just as I’m getting home after my semi-bar crawl, he calls. I answer. The conversation. OMG. Words can’t describe it (in a BAD way). I get off the phone with him. He calls me back 3 minutes later. WTF dude?


2. He/She looks you up on Facebook, can’t find you & tells you he/she looked you up: Ok. I heart Google. I will do my research on a guy in a minute if I feel the need to do so. However, I am not going to “admit” “friend” or stalk said guy through social networks.

Brooklyn: I looked you up on FB but couldn’t find you?
Me: (I don’t want to be found idiot) Ummm, I don’t go by my last name.
Brooklyn: I used your e-mail address too
Me: That’s not the e-mail address I use for that account


3. If he/she talks about marriage excessively within the first 10 conversations: Not only did Brooklyn talk about marriage, he used the words “us”, “we”, “kids” in sentences.

Brooklyn: I really want to get married.
Me: (silence is golden)
Brooklyn: Don’t you wanna get married? I can see “us” having our two kids together
Me: (WTF)
Brooklyn: I’m really feeling you, if you like someone what’s the worst that could happen

Pump your breaks little one. I don’t know you. I don’t know your last name. I just channeled my inner psychic capabilities, and you did not appear in my future! Sorry.


4. He/She talks EXCESSIVELY about how much they like you in the 1st, 2nd, 3rd conversation: Red flag. Ok, they could be trying to get into your panties (boxers if you’re a guy) so they think flattery works. Wrong. Yes, I love compliments, but when you get too excessive with it, I start to zone out. Furthermore, that does not work with me. You loose cool points.


Brooklyn: I don’t know what it is, but I’m really feelin' you
Me: Thanks
Brooklyn: No, really. You’re smart, attractive, mysterious. Like I wanna know everything about you.
Me: (Pause, on twitter)
Brooklyn: You’re different from girls I’ve dealt with in the past
Me: (Twitter is addictive)
Brooklyn: I really really like you. You’re gonna be my future wife
Me: (#WDDDA)

 
5. He/She tries to tell you woe are me stories: Do not, do not talk about how bad you got it, how hard it is for you, nor about ex relationships. I don’t ask, therefore I do not want to hear it. Brooklyn started out good the first couple of times we talked, but then it just went down, down, down hill. He basically committed involuntary suicide.


6. He/She should not ask you to move in with you: Runnnnnnnnnn. Words can’t express it. I don’t know where to begin with this portion of the convo. Needless to say, Brooklyn went from saying we should move in together, to I’ll pay you to sleep on your couch. This is where I had to end the convo.

Me: I do not know you like that
Me: I don’t need a roommate, nor am I looking for one
Me: Deuces

He is forever known as do not answer

Thank God he doesn’t know where I live, what I drive & where I work. Fucking crazy ass.

The Weekend Update: March of the Penguins

Sorry for slacking on the updates, but I’m so used to writing twits in 140 characters or less, writing a blog seems like writing a novel right now! In any case, I had a good weekend (with the exception of yesterday, yesterday was a beast). Here’s the weekend review in no particular order...

7. Well since I fell of the pink sexy wagon on Thursday, I decided to go hard Friday & Saturday.
Friday = 5 glasses of wine, 2 Amstel Lights, 1 shot
Saturday = 4 Red Bull & vodka’s, 1 vanilla Stoli & lime, 1 Rum Runner

6. Friday was mostly chilling with the chick friends. Started off on U, went to NY Ave. Ended up back on U. Started at 6, didn’t get home till 2:30...I’m surprised I made it. Saturday was club hopping. Three clubs+ one night=good times.

5. I still don’t understand why guys continue to wear sunglasses in the clubs. Guess they didn’t get the “you are lame if you wear sunglasses in the club” memo.

4. I’ve been meeting a lot of guys from Brooklyn lately. Three things I noticed. (1) the migration from Brooklyn to DC. I feel like it’s equivalent to the march of the penguins. Like really. I’ve met like 30 guys from Brooklyn this weekend. Ok maybe not 30... (2). They talk a good game (3) Shy is not in their vocabulary. I met this young guy from Brooklyn two weeks ago. I told him he was too young for me. He was a persistent little something. He stroked my ego and was like, “what, you’re only like 23 or 24 right?”...talked my number right out of my hand, and I was sober!

3. I had to twit about this Saturday night. This guy tried to lick my face. Did I miss something. Is licking faces the new “in” thing?

2. This was the week/weekend Brian was supposed to be in town. I deleted his number after the last time I talked to him, so I never called to see if he was still coming. Saturday, I went to one of “our” spots we used to frequent for the first time since his departure. It was kind of weird, because I used to go there with him all the time. I almost expected him to pop up and start his “so you think you can dance” antics.

1. I start my string of vacations...first up Boston, Friday. Can’t wait. Boston get ready!

Somewhat Sober Now

I have no idea what I was trying to blog about last night. I don’t know who the “client” is. Seriously. I was three sheets to the wind. But Brian’s roomy WAS “thirsty”. He tried to talk to me, then he tried to talk to PATT, then he tried to talk to me. Seriously dude???

I had so much fun last night, I’ll probably be suffering all day. I didn’t get home till after 4am, knowing I had to get up & go to work. Somehow, Brian & Roomy talked me into hanging at their place after the club. I ended up fixing myself an omelet (no I did not cook for their “hungry asses”) and waited for PATT. I don’t know how we got split up, but she saved the day and took me home.

T-minus 6 days until Brian’s departure. He invited me to go to Louisiana to visit him and hang for the Essence fest in two weeks.

Maybe A Shot Of Vodka Would Be Appropriate Now...

Tonight, after coming from a work networking event, I was doing my nightly blog crawl (when I read/lurk on other blogs) and my inbox popped up with a new message. Of course I opened it, and it was a really nice thoughful comment from Anonymous. I was appalled at the joy in the message immediately reacted, and typed out a long response, pasted below for your reference. In any case I deleted it a few minutes later. Why? Well, after reading what I posted and what Anonymous posted, I felt like I had every right to overreacted. Call it hormones, lack of DICK, lack of VODKA, or whatever you may...but I generally don't get my panties in a bunch. In fact, I like bullshit "constructive criticism" and other people's points of view. Sometimes it makes me look at something differently, sometimes it offers a new perspective from what my friends and I chat about, and sometimes it's just pure comedy. I don't expect people to agree with me I know I'm right all of the time, and with everything I do...call it infinite knowledge rebellion or whatever, but I always kind of marched to my own drum beat, or rather my theme songs that play in my head when I walk into a room. That being said, I do appreciate and love some all comments, suggestions, dialogue and other points of views. However, if it's an attack on me...do be prepared for my now pms, vodka induced, lack of dick response.  Feel free to comment!


Response In Question...

@ Anonymous - WTF???? Hold on, let me re-phrase that... WHAT THE FUCK??? Clearly, you aren't a follower of the blog, and I respect that, as well as your opinion. However, how many posts have you actually read? How many e-mails have you sent or questions have you asked?

You clearly, clearly, clearly, don't know what the fuck you are talking about...If you are trying to make a point, it's lost. If you are referring to a guy, that I'm sprung off...who could it possible be, that was mentioned here? Brian??? We've never had sex, Mr. Henry, we've known each other for 8/9 years now. The Old Man...nope never horizontally tangled with him. Tony??? I've known him for over a year...

Yes, I've had sex with other guys, but in no way, shape or form do I think sex is going to keep a man. If I CHOOSE TO HAVE WILD, HEAD BOARD BANGING SEX it's because I want to, and I USE PROTECTION...

I've never used sex to gain favors or give favors... or anything else...so, maybe you should read everything before passing JUDGMENT on me...then if you still feel the same way...put a stick up your ass...(as Brian says...respect mon)

However. I do appreciate your comment and hopefully I answered some questions for other people who may have been curious...keep em' coming... I so do appreciate the candidness

Operation New Guy: I Forget What Day

Operation New Guy.....ehhh, not getting the quality....just the corny & pure torture. The one who had the most potential...Danny, well he’s lacking conversational skills. Actually, all of them are.

Monday night, was pure torture....I mean, forget water boarding, if you really want to torture someone, have them to talk to some of the Lame’s I’ve been meeting. The guy that said he wants to get a pedicure with me.... “JB”. He sent me a series of text messages Sunday & Monday. Since, he couldn’t seem to stop texting me, I told him to call me later on. Like clockwork, I received a call from him...madness.

First, he’s a bit of a stutterer. Actually, it’s more like he takes looooonnnng pauses and says the same thing over. What would normally be a 15 minute conversation, turned into 30 minutes of unadulterated torture. Aside from that, he’s another guy, who has never, ever, ever lived outside of Maryland. Moving from Baltimore to Rockville was the highlight of his 30 something years. And traveling. When I asked him if he likes to travel. He said "yeah, when I go to Chicago, I don't just go to the city, I go to the parts people don't tell you about." WTF?

Can I please meet someone with a passport and a few stamps......

Vodka, Big Hands & Naps...Not In That Order

Some interesting and not so amusing things happened to me this weekend, mind you my weekends start on Thursday, sometimes Wednesdays, depending on the week. In any case, here's the top 10 in review.

10. I started Thursday night with happy hour with my co-worker/friend from a volunteer project, "Jason". When I first met him, I thought he was cute and despite our age difference we had a lot in common (he's 3 years younger). With time, it wore off. Now, well I think he's..."different". His drink of choice, a Midori Sour. After one, he said, he was "feeling it". What? Are you serious? I know he's not a drinker, I would have preferred he just opt for a coke or water. But a Midori Sour??? He made me feel like a lush for drinking wine!!!

9. Jason & I ended our, "happy hour" around 8. I wasn't ready to go home, so I called Brian to tell him I was headed to his place. For the first time in weeks, I took the Metro. I get off my train, to transfer and this sorta cute in the face guy stops me. He follows me up the escalator and asks me for my number. He pulls out his cell phone, and lo & behold it's Cartoon hands!!! Shit, it's a small world! He doesn't recognize me (I think). I gave him a fake name & number. Blame it on the...

8. Still on Thursday. After finally making it to Brian's house, I hang out with him, his roommate, and his friend. Remember, the cocky guy? He's was here visiting for the weekend. My intentions were to hang out at Brian's for a second then head home. Somehow, I ended up back at the lounge Jason and I were at earlier, although I knew I had to go to work in the morning...

7. Friday was such a nice day out, although I really wanted to stay home, I really wanted to go out. Again, you know who I hung with...it's becoming a bad habit to break.

6. Saturday morning, I get a morning wake up call at 8am from Mr. Henry. Who in the F, calls that early in the morning on a Saturday??? Don't they know, I'm a (recovering) party girl? I push ignore and try to go back to sleep. I can't. Damn him. After showering and getting myself together, I return his call.

5. After spending 4 long ass hours with Mr. Henry, it's about 2:30 in the afternoon. I have things to take care of, and want to get a nap in before my evening festivities. I tell Mr. H, I'm going home to take a nap.
Mr. Henry: Yeah, a nap sounds really good right now.

Me: You want to take a nap with me?

Mr. Henry: You know I can't lay next to your booty

Me: It's called self-control. Besides, didn't you just say, you were too lazy, when it comes to women?

Mr. Henry: That's different.

Me: Oh well. I offered. I'm soooo tired.

Mr. Henry: You know, I will come over

4. Mr. Henry comes over. He tosses and turns and is moving waaayyy to much. In my head, I'm thinking it was a bad idea. Then, he tries to horizontal dance. NO. He tries again. NO. He tried again, and finally I say, "No, it's tempting, but no thanks". My nap is ruined. He's pissed and doesn't talk to me. I drop him off at the Metro, thank him for lunch. He slams the door. I said a nap. He heard sex. Nap does not = sex. Both three letter words...but not equal.

3. Still on Saturday. I went out with Brian & his friend. I get to the club first. As soon as Brian walks in, he gives me a huge hug, like we haven't seen each other in years! I pull the SweetDiva card and buy him and his friend a drink as soon as he lets me go. His friend is amazed, and I earned cool points with Brian! At the end of the night, he gives me another huge hug!!!

2. Apparently I was really feeling my vanilla vodka & lime's, because a new guy I met last night, sent me a text, and said I told him, I like to get Pedicures and go to the spa. He told me, he'd love to do that with me this weekend.

1. Saving the best, or almost amusing for last. Tony called me Tuesday night after 1am. I told him it was "late". He called me last night at 11:30. I ignored his call. Well, somehow his number was in my phone at 2:30am, post bar, post 5 or 8 vodka & limes. I don't remember what I told him...blame it on the...

Stalkerface

Uhhh, Fetish guy...you know, the one from a couple of weeks ago. Pretty persistent. (i.e. Stalkerface) He has continuously e-mailed me, even if I decided not to respond to his attempts to forge some kind of “computer love”. So finally, I sent him this nice message:

Hi, (Stalkerface Fetish Guy)

Thanks for the e-mail (i.e. stop stalking me). I deleted my online profile (so you can’t find me) and am not interested in meeting anyone via the internet anymore (just you).

I wish you the best in your search for Mrs. Right (or in fulfilling your secret fetish).

Good Luck.
(Diva)


Do you know this StalkerFool (no other terms fit) e-mailed me again today!!!


Oh, and the Securityguard cornered me again today...HELP!!!!!!

WTF? (Again)

What the hell? I'm at a loss for words. Seriously. I hung out with Brian yesterday. His roommate met us out. His roommate HIT ON ME (a lot, and extremely hard). He tried to get me to go home with them. Then he had Brian to text me, to see if I would come over.

Now don't get me wrong, his roommate is cute, not my type, but cute.

What the hell?

The New Not Gonna Happen Guys

Awhile ago, I said if you put all of the guys I date into a room, they wouldn’t have much in common. Well last week, I met three guys. Two of them work in my building, well actually one does now, the other one got relocated, and the other guy I met in my neighborhood. So here’s the juice:

New Guy # 1: We’ll call him “Adam”. So Adam worked in my building up until last week. He didn’t work at my place of employment, but I’d see him every morning on my way to my office. Out of kindness, and just being cordial, I’d wave to him because I had to walk pass the door to his office. He was the security guard there, so he sat right in front, and seen me every morning. Well one morning a few weeks ago, he got the courage to ask me for my number. At first I was leery about giving him my number, because of the fact he worked in my building, which is just too close for comfort; however I didn’t want to be rude. So he calls me the same night.

For lack of a better word the conversation was torture. I hate when a guy calls me, and breathes on the phone. I can only do so much to facilitate the conversation. So in my head, I already made up my mind about him...he’s not a keeper. Aside from his lame-ness, we just aren’t compatible. I mean, I asked him what he did for fun, and what did he like to do. His answer, not much, the movies. He doesn’t get out. WHAT??? That’s like foreign to me. We live in a city full of everything from museums, to concerts, art openings, bars & clubs, and the list goes on, and “You Don’t Get Out??? NEEEXXXTTT!!!

Oh, and P.S. He doesn’t travel. Born & raised in DC, and his claim to fame when I asked him if he travels, is Maryland, Virginia, & South Carolina. DC sits in-between Maryland and Virginia, so they don’t count in my eyes, I’m sorry, but that’s not enough.


New Guy # 2: The next guy is “Terry”. Terry works in my building, as the main security guard for the whole building. He’s new to the building, so when I noticed the normal guard wasn’t around anymore, I asked him if she went on vacation. From that day, he’d stop me, talk/heavily flirt with me. Last week he asked me for my number. He called me and was pretty much...boring as Fuck. I’d rather read “War and Peace” than to sit on the phone with a man who cannot hold an interesting enough conversation to keep my attention. Also, he was pretty much like Adam when it came to “extra” activities and traveling. I’m not a travel snob, but it boggles me, when I meet 30 something year olds whose idea of traveling is visiting the state next to their home state. It gets my panties in a bunch when I meet a guy who was born & raised in a city, has lived there all of his life, and has no inclination to “try” a DIFFERENT city or state. If you don’t like it, you can always move back home. Am I crazy for “thinking outside the box”?

Last but not least, New Guy #3: This guy took the cake. I mean really took the cake. I’m going to call him “Cain”. I met him when I was coming out my neighborhood corner store in search of last minute ingredients for my last minute dinner. When I walked in, I seen him look at me. I kept going. Got my things, walked out the store; he was outside waiting. He asks me if he can talk to me. I let him walk me half-way home and we talk. He’s cordial, proper, clean-cut, pretty cute, and a gentleman. We exchange numbers. He calls me a few days later and we set-up a “semi-date” for Saturday. He asks me if I want to come to his place, or should he come to mine. I tell him neither. “I don’t know you like that”. He tells me he really wants to hang with me, it’s his “god-mother’s” birthday, he wants me to come with him. I meet him there. He’s cuter than I remember. He introduces me to everyone. He introduced me to one person as his future wife! It’s laid back, cool, chill, everyone is having a good time. He caters to me and checks on me throughout the night.

Afterwards, we go to his place and his neighbors come over, and we play poker. I head home before they leave, as not to give him any ideas...so here’s the cake. He tells me this, while we’re at his family’s house...he was in JAIL for 6 years for selling drugs! WTF? Hell no. He tells me the story. His biological mom died, and he started selling. Ok, so I’m doing the calculation in my head...that means he just got out of JAIL....uhhhh sorry, I can’t do that. It’s a hard BIG pill to swallow. I’m not judgmental, but WTF??? What the hell? What were you doing for 6 years while you were in jail??? Who do you know/hang out with? What are you doing now??? I’m sorry, I just can’t do it. I don’t care how cute you are.

WTF? The Argument

The First (Last) Argument of 2009

I Was Mad As Hell.
Why I don't know. I guess it was a combination of ego, pride, not being in control, shitty-ness of the whole situation.


Here's My Take On It
Dumb Fuck (i.e. Tony) was still mad about Friday. He probably talked to some of his friends (female friends at that) and they probably fed him the BS most friends who aren't in the situation do..."that ____________ isn't shit" sorta crap... "Or you know she had a dude over"... and the classic..."Fell asleep my ass"

My other view after deep contemplation and not telling any of my girls for 24 hours about the fight, was this: His ego is bruised, he doesn't know who to believe, he's still mad, and his emotions got caught up and he didn't want them to. (I know, fuckin humor me for a moment).

The Fight

So after our "make-up" conversation yesterday, I wanted to see him in person and I tell him so. I want to PERSONALLY apologize again, and just let him know, I'm not the flaky, BS type. I mean, come the fuck on, if I had a guy over, I would have called him, so he wouldn't pop up...like "Dude, be smart about this"...

Anyways, we set it up. I'm going to meet him near the gym he works out at, since I was going to be in the area and had to do some errands. Although our time wasn't specific, I figured we'd probably hook up around 3 or 3:30 (after his work-out). At about 3:15 I send him a text to let him know I'm in the area and what store I am at. He immediately sends me one back and says he was taking a nap. He's headed to the gym.

Fine.

I go to the next store to get some stuff. I call him around 4:30. No answer. I send him a text to let him know I'm still in the area. In the back of my mind, I'm thinking' he's still mad. I go to the next store. By this time, I'm pretty much done with my errands in this neighborhood, and I need to get moving. It's shortly after 5. I call him to let him know I didn't hear from him and I gotta go.

As I'm driving to my next destination I have an EPIPHANY. "Wait. Why in the fuck am I still apologizing? Why in the hell would he assume the worst about me, seeing as how I didn't give him any reason to feel that way?" I send him a text basically saying how I feel. Then...

I TURN OFF THE PHONE. (I know).

About an hour later. I turn it back on. He calls me about 15 minutes later.

Tony: We need to talk

Me: Ok, you're still mad about Friday?

Tony: This isn't about that, it is, but it's more complicated.

Me: What...

Tony: I have feelings for someone else and I have feelings for you...

(Silence is golden)

Tony: You still there?

Me:

Tony: Hello?

Me: I'll talk to you later.

Tony: What? What does that mean, that you'll talk to me later, or you'll never talk to me again? I want to be honest with you.


Then the fight starts. As we're going back and forth and I'm bring up the fact the HE was the one sending me messages about how much he missed me, and how much HE was feeling me, not me.

We're yelling at each other and I'm sitting in the parking lot of Target heated. I have all of this shit running through my mind. He's trying to get me to see his point of view and keeps saying nothing ever happened with them, but he liked her, then she moved, but there's something with us, and he wants me to be a part of his life. Then...

I STOP.

Why in the fuck am I arguing with him about this? I'm SEEING other people, he's not my boyfriend and we aren't on that level.

I tell him so. Then I take a deep breath.

Me: Bye Tony

I hang up.

Ulterior Motives

Something is in the water again....

WTF??? I mean, yesterday’s conversations and the one that ensued this morning has me believing something is seriously in the water, or better yet Karma is F’N with me, and I don’t find it to be funny.

This Morning

I get my normal wake-up call from the Old Man (he calls me every morning between 8 & 8:30). He can hear the frustration in my voice as I am running late for work, I didn’t sleep well last night, I had to do my hair, take out the trash, etc, etc, etc. I tell him I’ll call him back. I receive one more call and a text. I get to work at 8:35 (only 5 minutes late) and call him.

Old Man: Are you ok, it’s sounds like you are frustrated
Me: I am. I was running late, I had to do my hair which took 15 minutes, take out the trash, blah, blah, blah
Old Man: (laughing) The hair huh?
Me: Yes, it’s frustrating. I hate flat flat ironing it every morning. I’m used to getting up and going. Plus it’s expensive to maintain, I have to go to the salon everyother week, which is $55.00 a visit, that adds up, I'm going back to my old style (curly)
Old Man: But I like the new look, it sounds like what you need is a sponsor, we’ve talked about this before...

I cut him off and we talk about something else.

Ok. I have a problem. Is he seriously trying to be my “sugar daddy”. I mean “it sounds like you need a sponsor”. I don’t know if it’s my ego or my pride or what, but I don’t want him “sponsoring” me. I mean WTF? How does that even sound? It’s different if he’s my boyfriend and he offers to pay for little things here and there and we’ve established some type of commitment, but what the hell does a sponsorship include, sex, money, prostitution?

Can someone please clarify this for me???


Side Note: Years ago when I changed my hairstyle, and Mr. Henry told me he didn’t like it, I told him I didn’t care, and until he started paying for me to get it done, he couldn’t comment on it... he never did...but that was different, right?


Yesterday

Tony and I had a fight. I’ll blog about it later. I’m still trying to sort it all out in my mind. Let’s just say, another one bites the dust...

Christmas Eve: What Does That Mean?

Christmas Eve

I spent Christmas Eve this year with Tony. Before he came over, I thought about what I did last year. Last year, I didn't go home because I had a trip and surprise planned for my Mom in February, so I stayed here. I spent it with this guy I met online, whose name escaped me. I do remember he made me a candlelit dinner, and I spent the night. I woke up the next morning, thinking damn...it's Christmas...I can't believe I'm here. We didn't have sex, but I somehow felt dirty...I guess it was from all those years of being with my family on Christmas Eve, but I found myself with this guy, who I wasn't feeling enough to have sex with...name begins with a D if that means anything....in any case I digress. This year was different. I spent it with someone I know/knew, and it wasn't bad.

I cooked dinner, made cookies, we watched a movie and he left. Still no sex, not that I wanted to have sex, but since it's been so long, I might as well become celibate It wasn't a bad Christmas Eve. Sort of sweet, like Grandma's gifts, that you hate, but keep around because you love Grandma, and you don't want her to ask where they are at...something like that...

Also, I made him a gift, because he told me he brought me one...so I didn't want him to leave empty handed. I made homemade cookies, and a really cutesy/corny CD with music I thought he'd enjoy. I personalized it and wrote some interesting things. I didn't give it to him, instead I slipped it in his jacket pocket. When he left, I sent a message that said "check your pocket"

He texted me back and said "Thank u, luv, u"...

I was confused as fuck...what does that mean???

Tainted Water

I'm convinced the government has put something in the water in DC. Maybe it started out as a social experiment then somehow mutated and got out of hand; then they jumped ship and left us to deal with it. That's why I drink bottled water from France...no tap for me. I don't want to catch what's in the water...

Why the rant? Because Cartoon Hands (Carl) sent me a F'n picture of his "johnson" out of nowhere.

I swear to you, I did not give him any signals, key words, or indication that I wanted him to send me yet another picture of himself...especially his "johnson". We've never had phone-sex, never talked about sex or body parts...hell we haven't even had our 1st date yet. Damn, I know I haven't had any in awhile but WTF? WTF?

Don't drink the water in DC...