Mr. Good On Paper

So I am F'N tired of meeting these good on paper guys, wasting time on the phone, texting, e-mailing, then finding out Mr. Good On Paper has some major characteristic flaw...we all know some Good On Paper Guys, you know the one's:

attractive - (check)
good job - (check)
nice car - (check)
educated - (check)
lives alone/or own's place - (check)
non-smoker - (check)
no baby's mama's - (check)
no girlfriend or wife - (check)
spiritual - (check)
healthy/works out - (check)

So what's missing??? Hmmm, it's usually something major, like: bad in bed, bad breath, calling/texting too much, player type, too nice, not spontaneous or adventurous, bad conversation, habitual liar, small package nicely wrapped...if you get the drift. In any case, you never find out about the OTHER traits until it's too late and you've invested time (that you can't get back) into this Good on Paper Guy. I have the perfect example, of one of my former "Good On Paper Guys".

Meet Carlos:

He's an ex boyfriend from a long, long, time ago. He had/has it all. He's the quintessential "Good On Paper Guy". He even took the "Good On Paper Guy-ness" to the next level and owned not one, not two but three (3!) houses (financially stable - check). He's a non-smoker, non-drinker, who is drug/disease free (check). He's a military man, who worked his way up the military ranks (ambitious - check). He was kind of a golden boy who didn't want to have sex outside of marriage (Virgin- no check). I kid you not, the last time I spoke with him (September) he had only had sex with two (2!!!) women in his whole life (I wasn't one of them...another blog another time). His ex-wife and now his current girlfriend... (just two)...commitment type (check).

So what's wrong him (rather what did I think was wrong)?

Long story short, he wanted to get married and be in a relationship with me (no I'm not kicking myself for passing this seemingly good man up). My major issues with him were: spontaneity, predictability, boring-ness(with a capital B!), different education, spiritual and political values. He didn't want to engage in sexual relations (sorry I gotta test drive it first)...and he didn't like going out and doesn't go out. (that's like DEATH for me!)

Anyways, he was the quintessential Good Guy On Paper...

Did I miss something???

Just my thoughts...it's cold outside (I don't care what you say, long john's are NOT sexy) so I'm inside (trying not to fall off the party wagon), so one of three things are going to happen...1) I'll blog all day and night, 2) I'll cave and invite the Old Man over...damn wintertime weather!!!, 3) I'll fall of the Wagon, and be at the Club/Bar in no-time!!!