Friday, May 29, 2009

I Think Porn Is Stupid...

Tonight, Mr. Henry came over. We "exercised" and I burnt like 400 calories although the munchies and after "exercise" drink cancelled the calories out, but I digress. My head wasn't in it. I was thinking about all kinds of stuff, not related to our "workout". Uhhh maybe these are things I shouldn't have been thinking about:

11. Going to sleep afterwards

10. How we are big freaks for having sex at 5pm

9. If I should go out

8. Who was texting me, since my phone went off twice

7. If I was going to get an O

6. Blogging about not thinking about our romp session while we were romping.

5. Why in the hell my neighbor's dog is so loud when they get home, and wondering if they could see me, if they got too close to my window.

4. Wondering if my neighbors could hear us...

3. Laughing at the funny faces he made

2. Wondering if my face was just as funny as the face he was making

1. Wondering where he got the new position from

Needless to say, the O was not achieved...think I'm going to sit the next few sessions out, re-group and think about stuff...

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Revisiting The "O" & The Weekend

I've been revisiting the whole no-orgasm thing...

To start my weekend off tonight (remember, weekends start on Thursdays), Mr. Henry and I are hanging out. I started to think about the times I came close to getting the BIG ONE with him. For the most part, every close "O", was preceded by a fight. So that's it right!?! I should start a fight with him, so we can have wild make-up head board banging sex. I got nothing I'm mad about though... even when we had the whole "relationship" discussion last week, and he brought up us getting relationship counseling, cause I know how to push his buttons, and he pushes mine sometimes (uhhh, we aren't on that marriage trek) was kind of like whatever.

Like this whole on again, off again thing is getting old. We go through phases where one of is is into it more than the other, and right now, it's his phase. When he brought up the relationship counseling thing, images of balls & chains and wedding bells came to mind. Uh, isn't that for people who plan on getting married soon? Did I miss his memo on something. Me & Mr. Henry, relationship counseling???

In Other News:

Yesterday, it was good hearing from Island Prince. I think it's cute how he's trying to keep the lines of communication open (not on my $1.99 per minute International rate!). He tried to tell me about the protests that's going on in his country, re wages & France something or other, but a lot of it got lost in translation. Then we talked about the whole, "when are we going to see each other again thing".

Brian called (as clockwork). He asked me if I was mad about the whole strip club thing again (he brought it up on Monday). I told him no, but "our relationship isn't that serious, we don't talk about serious things". Then he tried to cover his tracks, and said, I never talk about guys I'm fucking (his words, not mine). He values our friendship & didn't mean it that way, blah, blah, blah. I changed the subject. We talked about his "orders", (he'll be in Louisiana, not Texas as expected) the going away shindig he's throwing and what we were going to do this weekend. Nothing concrete as I have "happy hour" plans on Friday and a work function Saturday morning. I temporarily restored his number.

This weekend I'm going to resurrect the aborted Mission. This time, I'll make sure my new buddy isn't as hot. He's got to be:
easy on the eyes (for sure)
able to hold his liquor (unlike that one Tool I met)
willing to bar, club & hop Country (passport a must)

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

The Follow-Up... the conversation started...

Me: The girl that you mentioned in passing, that you talked about wife-ing. You never talk about her, but you mention other girls. Why?

Brian: Probably cause our friendship isn't that serious. We don't talk about serious things. It's light. Like just cause I don't talk about her, doesn't mean I don't care about her. I talk about her with Mark.

Me: Is it because it's something that's so personal to you, you don't bring it up?

Brian: (Shrugs) You probably wouldn't believe anything I say about her, because of how you see me act with other girls, and you'd probably be like "yeah right". But your boys understand, and you don't have to explain anything.

The conversation kind of ended and we started talking about other stuff at that point. A rule I always live by is the don't ask, don't tell policy unless you really want to to know. When you do ask, be prepared for the answer & don't get mad, cause you asked. I think the thing that "bothered" me, was the whole part, re "our friendship isn't that serious".

Obviously, I looked at it differently, yeah, light and easy, but also, serious. Not in the relationship way BF/GF way, but IDK... not in the "just passing through" way either. When you spend so much time with someone, the way that we do/did, I guess I thought we were better friends... oh well. What can I say???

Moving on...

In Other News

I know, the last few posts, have been about Brian, ok a lot more than a few, but who's counting. It doesn't mean that the other guys don't exist, they just haven't existed as much... I need a new line-up...

I talked to Tony twice last week. Just conversations. He's still unemployed, still not doing much (nothing to be exact). It's sad, because he has an amazing natural talent, and he's not using it. He's waiting on bands to call him, and waiting on his "big break" but he's not marketing himself. He's not looking. Well how in the hell are they gonna find you?

The Old Man sent me a text and I didn't respond. I know we are going to eventually run into each other, cause he lives in the salsa bars, and eventually, I'm going to go salsa dancing...hmmmm

Chris & I texted back and forth a few days last week & talked on the phone once...nothing there. Like we say we are going to meet up for lunch, or sync our schedules one day. But I haven't made the effort, and neither has he. I guess the option is there if one of us wanted it...I really don't want it.

Mr. H and I are doing the same. I wonder, when will we "officially" stop.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

F**k Mars, Men Are From Neptune...

I think the phrase, “Our friendship is not that serious”, is what set-off the “girl” emotions in me last night. Of course I didn’t cry, or throw a tantrum, or even better, throw my glass of wine upside his head. Instead, I sat cool, calm & collected in front of him, not displaying what was going through my mind, finished the conversation, polished off the drink, headed to the second bar, and went home...all without telling him anything. Nothing. But I didn’t really understand the time.

I don’t think he meant it in a way as to say we are not friends...however, in the context of what we were talking about, it really hit me, how HE views the “friendship” and now I use the term "friendship" loosely, because I view friends differently. I mean...

How can you hang out with someone 3 to 4 days a week and the friendship isn’t “that serious”. How can you spend a weekend in Miami together, gallivant for 5 days to Jamaica with each other, and introduce to friends, family members, co-workers and fraternity brothers...and the friendship is deemed not that serious.

I never thought we were on the acquaintance level. And I know, I’m not a BFF or branded & bound to him through some social order. However, I thought we were friends...maybe not Bonnie & Clyde ride & die, but the friendship "term" Diva & Brian would have sufficed in it's own right. I guess I got confused, by the fact that I'm the first person he hangs out with to get the weekend started, or the fact that he's told me a few things in confidence or I've seen a "few things".

I've mentioned before in comments & posts, that he's probably not into "that way". And I get that. I'm not mad about it. I just don't understand how he really views it.

To be continued....

The End of the Weekend...No Bells & Whistles

So, my long weekend is finally over. Friday night, although I was still tired, from Brian's antics, I met a few friends for happy hour. The thing I love about DC, is you'll never run short on places to get drinks! It was a chill low-key thing. I ended up calling it an early night.

Saturday, I hung with some of my girls. We went to this lounge/club/bar and had a great time!

Sunday, I hung with my "younger" by 5 years co-worker. OMG, I'm getting old. We danced all night! I had a great time, but when I woke up, my body was sore. Damn, I haven't danced like that since my college days! I forgot how much energy the young one's have.

And Monday...what would the weekend be without finishing it with Brian. He went out of town Friday morning and pretty much de-planed and hung out with me as soon as he landed yesterday. We went and had drinks in Adams Morgan, then went to a bar by his place in VA. We had a few conversations. A little more insight into relationship stuff. I gave him the flask gift-set. I didn’t wrap it. Forwent the Safeway bag. No card. No note. No bells and whistles. It was just in the plain white box it came in. He seemed to like it.

I deleted his number when I got home.

Monday, May 25, 2009

The Start Of A Long Weekend...

As you know, my weekends start on Thursday (Wednesday if necessary). Thursday night I hung with Brian. He was out of town all week, got in Thursday and was leaving Friday morning at the butt crack of dawn; so we got our face time in. His roommate tagged along. Just a quick rundown of the night’s festivities, we went to a local bar by Brian’s house. His roommate & I shot pool, I won, then Brian & I were going to play, but he sunk the black ball in. Then we kinda just stood around and talked to people, clowned around etc. His roommate was flirting again. Let’s see, he tried to rub my hair, I moved his hand. He tried to touch my leg, I moved his hand. He asked me for a massage, I said no, and he asked me some other random questions...

It’s official, I’m charging this one to the game. I’m done with “them”. We left the bar, and I was trying to head home. They tricked me:

Brian: Where are you going.

Me: Home

Brian & Roomie: Why, it's still early, come with us

Me: No.

Brian: Don’t you want something to eat at this restaurant

Me: (hesitate)

Brian: Come on, stop being lame,

Roomie: You’re not the only one who has to go to work in the morning. We all gotta get up in the morning.

Me: You guys just ate.

Brian: I want something else though...I’m not really hungry, I’m just being greedy...

Me: I’ll come for a sec. It’s late...

We walk in the restaurant....and it’s a strip club. Ass Holes. They left that little tiny detail out! (I must say though, the place was very inconspicuous. Maybe it's cause the chicks had to wear pasties & underwear. I dunno.)

I left less than 5 minutes later.

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

The Vault: Mr Romantic (Part 2 of 2)

Sooo, we're on the couch watching the movie and I fall asleep...I know, bad right, but he got over it. He wakes me up and we go upstairs to his room. Now, a lot of things are going through my mind simultaneously, "do I stay, I'm tired, it's cold outside, he's gonna try to do me, even if he says he's not, he will try, I don't feel like driving, I should go"

I stayed (Bad Diva) sex. He tried. We fooled around. No sex. I woke up at the butt crack of dawn and tried to sneak out. He woke up and walked me to the door, asked me what I was doing for the day, blah, blah, blah.

So, we continue to talk, go on a few lunch dates...then it fizzles. Now there are some major things about Mr. Romantic that I didn't like. However, I'm trying to do a happy post, awww, hell, who am I kidding: he had a small man complex. He tried to BOSS me around and talk over me. When we would have a friendly little Political conversation, he HAD to ALWAYS be right (so he thought), he wore shoulder pads in his suits which gave him a weird upside down triangle shape. He was waaay skinnier than me, he almost looked mal-nourished, like he was on a bread & water only diet, which was a turn-off...other than that, he was ok....whew, ok.

He continued to call/text. We stayed in touch somewhat. Then one day, he said something that no guy has ever said to me before, "you don't want a man do you"?

WTF. Uhhh

Me: Why do you say that?

Him: I'm trying to be with you, but when I talk to you about relationships, etc, you stay stuff to make me think you don't want a man.

(You know what I was thinking in my head right?)

Me: (Silence) Uhhh, I do.

Him: No you don't.

Me: Ok

That was the last conversation we had for almost a year, until recently, when he used my side business (i.e. side hustle), and tried to find the PERFECT opportunity to bring up the fact he had a girlfriend...good for you...I don't care.

The thing I took away from our whole interaction, was that for once in one of our conversations, he was right. I didn't want anything at the time (at least with him), hell I don't know what I want NOW.

One minute I want a boyfriend, then the next I'm gallivanting to Jamaica, and drinking rum punch with my crush on a nude beach...

The Vault: Mr. Romantic (Part 1 of 2)

As promised, I went on some not so bad dates. Ultimately, the demise of the guys was due to lack of chemistry and attraction. They were ok, I mean they did have some qualities, I didn't quite like, hmmm, not really deal breakers however, let's focus on the positive!

Today, we'll start with Mr. Romantic. I met him online in late November early December of 07. We talked, e-mailed and text messaged each other for about two weeks before our first meeting. He was similar to his head shot, however he was extremely skinny in person, and his head was a big too big for his body...digressing, sorry. So anyways after our first meeting, we continued to talk and on Christmas Eve, he invited me to his place, in his words, "to pamper & spoil me". He promised dinner by candle light, massages (he was actually a massage therapist), the works. Since this was one of the few years I didn’t get to go home for the holidays, I agreed. Anyways, so we arrive at his place, and he starts getting ready to prepare dinner. I sit and watch him, and we chat. I offer to help and he adamantly declines, saying, "it's my day" then makes me a drink. So I'm making a mental note of all of this, he makes a pretty healthy meal (not that tasty), makes a really good drink, has Prince playing in the background, candles are lit...romantic right?

He puts his final touches on dinner, then has me to follow him to the table. But I was a little confused. There was only one plate.

Me: Aren't you going to eat?

Him: Yes, don't worry about me...

Me: But...

Him: Shhhh

He pulls his chair up right beside mine, as I reach for the fork, he grabs it, and begins feeding me. I will admit, this all felt very awkward. Like, maybe a little too much for a second date, and I never really had anyone to "feed" me literally. So dinner went on like that for awhile. He wouldn't allow me to pick the fork up or to do anything. After dinner, we head to the couch and watch a movie.

To be continued...

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

Unsolved Mysteries

I've never had an orgasm...the Big O, the Big Shebang...I think know I've came close a few times. You know, legs shaking, feeling like I'm going to explode, then he changes positions for whatever reason, it just disappears...I have a perfectly good theory, but I won't bore you with it. I guess I was just thinking about my latest sexcapade with Mr. H. I guess more like a horizontal 400 calorie burning work-out than anything else... it was a good workout, but I digress. I'm just curious...When did you realize you had the O, or are you still waiting for it?

Why is it always the ones you don't like, aren't into, are diagnosed crazy or are dodging and going into protective custody, the one's that call on time, text you constantly and profess their love to you while peeking in your first floor apartment window show you they like you, the one's you don't want?

So now that I got Brian's gift, I've been mulling over the card, do I get one, do I make it funny or sincere? When do I give it to him, at his going away party, alone??? I'm over-analyzing it. I should just throw it in a Safeway plastic bag, and drop it off.....right?

Why is Mr. Henry all of a sudden trying to resurface, he must have gotten the memo that Brian is leaving town...guess he missed the one about Summer.

I wanted to go Salsa dancing tonight, cause I haven't been in a while due to Heroes being my main obsession on Monday nights....I do not have that thing called a DVR...but I had a 50/50 chance of running into the Old Man, and those were odds I didn't feel like gambling with tonight...

Monday, May 18, 2009

My Random Week & Weekend In Review

In no particular order...

10. Mr. Henry spent the night last night.

9. Home was good but as soon as I got back, I hung with Brian.

8. I don’t think high-school relationships count, but my ex "Carlos" from h.s. (Mr. Good on Paper) sent me a text saying I was in his thoughts, etc. out the blue. It was so random, I thought something was wrong. Called him back to make sure he was ok.

7. The next day his girlfriend texts me and tells me to stop calling “her man”. a) do not bring the drama, b) take that up with him, c) what kind of insecure woman calls another woman...that’s just stupid and sooo very high-school. I called him and told him I didn’t appreciate her calling me and he needs to “check her”. He didn’t. They called me the next day...ugghh kids.

6. Tony called me, citing he hasn’t heard from me, and to “keep in touch more often”.

5. Mr. Henry and I had a long talk about “us”

4. Have you ever thought about someone else, while horizontal dancing”

3. I got Brian’s going away gift...the flask.

2. The tools are relentless. I also received other random texts from Chris and Latino Papi Alex

1. When the ex asked me if I was seeing anyone, I told him about Brian...I don’t understand how he says he still has feelings for me, and we haven’t dated since high-school, never had sex, and haven’t seen each other in like 5 years. My enquiring mind wants to know...

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

The Vault: Dessert On A Dime

So, I'm going home for a few days and I thought I'd reach back into the vault and tell you about a not so yummy dessert date. Around the same time I met the coke bottle glasses guy I met this other guy...we'll call him "Tyrone". I went on a binge and went out like 5 days in a row with my boy Chuck who was here visiting. The week he was here, I met like ten guys, most, ok all under the pre-tense of alcohol...what's new? Anyways, so the following week, I made it my mission to go out on as many dates as possible just for the hell of it. Tyrone called me one day to see if I wanted to go out. During the conversation, he kept complimenting me, and you know, just being really nice, etc, etc. How bad could it be right?

I had a dinner date the day we agreed to go out, so I suggested dessert. He offered to pick me up. Although I don't agree with guys picking me up on the first few dates (i.e. stalkers lurk), I agreed because at the time I lived in a fairly large apartment complex. So anyways, Tyrone gives me the disclaimer, that he really didn't have a lot of money. Being nice, I suggested we go Dutch, I just got out of college myself, so I knew how it could be. And, I mean we were only doing dessert. Surely that wouldn't be a problem. He says he could pay for "our" desert and that he'll call me when he's downstairs.

He picks me up in an old Cutlass or something along those lines. I didn't mind that. I'm not a car snob, however, when I opened the door, I was smacked in the face, by thick fog (i.e. Mary Jane, 4-20, weed). I know where this is going. He was decent looking. Subtract the years of inhaling, he probably could have been an 8, throw on some nice clothes, he could have been pushing 9.5. Digressing.

We go to Clyde's. Clyde's was my choice quite often back then because it wasn't too far from my place, it was in a well lit area, and the prices were decent. We sit and chat & place our orders. I skip the drink and get like a $5.00 dessert and water, mind you I had just came from a dinner date, so I wasn't really hungry, or pressed for food. We talk, have a good conversation, then the bill comes. He reaches for it and puts it down. I wait a few seconds, then I pick it up. It's $13 something with tax.

Tyrone, then proceeds to pull out change...i.e. coins...i.e. not dollar bills.

Tyrone: Hey, I'm sorry I don't know if I have enough. I went to the Metro today and they gave me back all of these quarters. Can you take care of the rest?

Me: Uhhh, ok, how much do you have?

Tyrone: $3 something

(the fucker, didn't even have enough to cover his dessert or tip)

Me: I got it.

So I paid. (Mind you, it was only like $13.00, but how lame is that, right???) Anyways, we get up and leave and I'm still chill. He asks me if I'm ready to go straight home. I use the excuse that it's late and I have to work in the morning. We pull up to my apartment complex, he decides he wants to talk. What in the hell do we have to talk about????

He then proceeds to ask me if we should finish our conversation upstairs....uhhh, my apartment??? (no way) I kindly decline...citing the work thing again.

Tyrone: But why? We were having such a good conversation and I'm feeling you and I think you are feeling me too. I just wanna talk.

Me: I really do have to get up early, sorry. Besides I don't know you like that.

Tyrone: But that's why I wanna finish our conversation, so you can get to know me. I promise, I'll sit on the floor. I gotta get up early too.

Me: No. Sorry. Drive safely. Thanks for a good evening.

I get out the car, no looking back, pissed because he couldn't even afford his "own" dessert, and he wanted to "come" up...WTF???

I get upstairs, and he calls me to try to make his case again.... NO, HELL NO. NEEEEEXXXXTTTTT!

(I promise the next time I dig in the vault, I will pull up an exceptionally good date!!!)

BTW, went out with Jason today, more on that tomorrow!!!

Monday, May 11, 2009

Hookah, Jello Shots & NY

As you know, my weekends start on Thursday, and what’s a weekend without Brian??? Thursday night, Brian, myself & one of his college friends hung out like the apocalypse was coming. We started off at a Hookah bar, the next thing you know, we stumbled upon Karaoke, then some dive-ish looking place that was playing hip hop. Brian & I ended up hanging till almost 3am. I was hurting the next day, seeing as how I had to be up & out the house by 6am...and all he had to was catch a flight. I won’t let him talk me into staying out that late anymore on a work night. I was so tired and out-of it on Friday I stayed in.

Saturday, I made my way to NY. When I thought about it, I hadn’t been to NY since Island Prince was here back in September! P.A.T.T. and I had a blast. Bar hopping by NYU, feeding jello shots to unsuspecting guys at the bar, dancing to Prince at the Groove, and jumping up and down like some college girls to some unknown rock cover band, to music we didn’t know the words to (and probably never heard of), and walking in the door at 4am! Good times.

Last night, when I got back I was supposed to hang out with Jason. He ended up canceling which I was ok with, since I was still recovering. We are going to the movies today. It’s not a date, but it will be our first time hanging out since we went to Happy Hour. I’ll let you know how it goes.

In Other News:

Thursday night, Mr. Henry tried to get me to come over his house. We exchanged tons of sext (risqué texts) messages, only for me to turn him down. I know, somewhat of a tease right? Earlier Thursday, I seen him after work, and a few hours later, he called me, to tell me how deliciously nice, he thought I looked. I’ve been turning him down since early March, and he’s still trying...hmmm.

The Tools haven’t let-up. In total last week, between the two of them, I received thirty-something text messages, and I don’t remember how many’s always the one’s you wouldn’t touch with a 10foot pole....ugh. So annoying.

In The Meantime...

I just got back into town not too long ago. Don't worry. I'll update you on my fab weekend. In the meantime, before I began taking shots of vanilla Stoli, I had the pleasure of being interviewed by Ms. Crystal Monae over at Therapeutic Conversations For Singles.

Thank you Crystal.

Check it out. I'll be back with updates tomorrow!!!

Thursday, May 7, 2009

Mission Aborted

So Operation Replace Brian has been aborted. I can’t replace him. I can only get someone who is similar, maybe better (or worse), but not him. Last night we attempted to go out and just ended up at a pool hall. We chilled, drank, the normal...then it really hit me...he’s leaving. End of story. Period. Adios. Sayonara. Goodbye. He’ll be gone the next three weekends, then when he gets back, I will have just a few weeks before the plug is pulled. So to occupy the time, he somehow managed to have in my already busy schedule, I’m traveling more. New York this weekend, home the following weekend, Vegas & the Dominican this summer, and if I can squeeze another trip in to Jamaica...all the better. Maybe even a trip to see him...

In Other News:

Tool 1 & Tool 2 keep calling/texting me.

Tool 1 (James) sent a text: Hey, I haven’t heard from you since our date. How are you.
Me: Good. Busy. It’s just bad timing. Sorry

Tool 2 (JB) leaves me 5 minute messages, and sends me at the minimum three text a day. One in the morning, one in the afternoon, one at night, and a few random ones for the hell of it.

I’m thinking about just getting a new number altogether. It always seems someone calls/text from out the blue, that I don’t wanna talk to. Latino Papi Alex still sends me text messages from time to time. Tony text me last week, as well as the Old Man. POW kindly reminded me that I’ve had my number for almost 6 years...yeah, I think it’s time for a new number, although I have become quite attached to it!

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

Q & A With Diva

A few people e-mail me from time to time with questions. So I decided, we are going to try a little thing called Q&A, with Diva. You can ask me anything you want... e-mail or comment & I'll post the questions. Here are the most recent questions:

Question 1: Are you going to tell Brian how you feel?

Answer: Probably not, unless I drink 4 to 6 vanilla vodka & lime's and wash it down with a Cornona light....hey I don't drink beer, but that's what it will take.

Question 2: Do you miss the Old Man?

Answer: Hell no! Next question...

Question 3: What happened in Jamaica?

Answer: I plead the 5th...ok, I will tell you this. I won second place at a pj party! Buy me a few shots & I'll tell all...

Question 4: IF Mr. Henry did a 180 would you reconsider?

Answer: I don't know. I'm not really sexually or emotionally attracted to him anymore...

Question 5: What is the ideal way for a man to approach you?

Answer: Hmmm, Creatively. Different. Respectfully. I prefer guys who are funny or just kind of stand apart from other guys...I love guys that can “talk noise” and take jabs, kind of a tit for tat, or guys that are extremely smart. In any case, they should engage me in a really good conversation. Of couse all of this is thrown out the window after 4-6 vanilla vodka & limes...

Monday, May 4, 2009

I Sure Know How To Pick ‘Em

Help! I've fallen, and I'm in Tool Hell! I mean really. My radar has been off for the last few months. (I have Brian to thank for that) Anyways, this weekend was a pretty low-key weekend, with the exception of the date from hell last night. Despite my sixth sense, common sense & gut feeling, I decided to give JB a chance, just for Tunde (you owe me one!!!). After many back & forth's and blah, blah, blah's we settled on seeing the new X-Men movie, my choice. See I figured since his conversational skills were horrid, that a movie would be the safest bet. You know, no talking...or at least limited talking before the movie started. WRONG!!!

First Impression: TOOL
Second Impression: MAJOR TOOL
Third IMPRESSION: OMG, I have to walk out with him, I hope no one sees me (yeah it was that bad)

Ok, let me back up. So JB, what can I say about him. I try to find something GOOD about everyone. I mean, something that I like about the person. Sometimes it takes me a long time, and sometimes it's just there. Well with JB, the only good thing I found, was I liked his glasses and they were perfect for his face. They were SEXY NERD, although he had no idea how to pull the rest of his outfit off. He had on long black shorts, with long black athletic socks, (I hate that) and black tennis shoes, and an army-ish looking t-shirt, The shorts looked liked wide leg Capri’s, and went well over his socks. WTF? I know we were going to be in a dark theater for 3 hours, but you'd think he'd dress better than that. To top it off, he told me over the phone, he was coming from work and had a change of clothes in the car, so he wouldn't have to go home. He should have just wore his work shit...

Lets see, what else...oh he talked a lot. A whole lot, and I couldn't really concentrate on all of the words because his breath was a bit...well...bad. Actually, it smelled like a dumpster on a hot day in July. I leaned more to left, because he was sitting on my right. I tried to make an excuse to leave & go to the concession stand, just so I could get some fresh air. He went instead, which allowed me about 5 minutes to take deep breaths with out gagging. When he came back, he had a small popcorn to share and a water for me & soda for him. I really appreciated it. But I didn't want to share. Not because I'm stingy, but I couldn't help to think where his hands had been. If he put that much thought into his grungey, backseat car outfit, who knew how much he'd put into washing his hands...

Speaking of talking, he didn’t know how to use his indoor voice, seriously. Like I whispered, just so he would follow my lead...nope not a chance. For the most part though, he was quite during the movie which was really good. And he was respectful, no getting drunk like the previous date with the other tool. The only other thing that got on my nerves besides his talking, his breath, and wardrobe choice, was the fact that he felt like he had to explain everything to me, but really he was the one a few crayons short in his crayon box. For example:

Him: Yeah, you know you would probably like Iron Man. I haven’t seen it but...

Me: I seen it, they are coming out with a part two soon...

Him: Well you know, my boy told me about it, and I was thinking it was probably about a man made of Iron, like Superman or something...but it’s not, he explained it to me and said he has a suit. I never seen it though. You know, they probably have it at Redbox. You know, the box where you can get movies, since they are coming out with a part two.

Me: Yeah, I seen it, you should see, it. Do you have Netflix

Him: No, I have this thing called a DVR, you know, you can record stuff on it, and watch it later. Because I don’t...

Me: Yeah, I know what a DVR is...

Him: Well you can record stuff on it. I don’t know about Netflix.

So, so painful. I learned my lesson. Stop giving guys my number when I’m drunk. Blame it on the...

Friday, May 1, 2009

Maybe A Shot Of Vodka Would Be Appropriate Now...

Tonight, after coming from a work networking event, I was doing my nightly blog crawl (when I read/lurk on other blogs) and my inbox popped up with a new message. Of course I opened it, and it was a really nice thoughful comment from Anonymous. I was appalled at the joy in the message immediately reacted, and typed out a long response, pasted below for your reference. In any case I deleted it a few minutes later. Why? Well, after reading what I posted and what Anonymous posted, I felt like I had every right to overreacted. Call it hormones, lack of DICK, lack of VODKA, or whatever you may...but I generally don't get my panties in a bunch. In fact, I like bullshit "constructive criticism" and other people's points of view. Sometimes it makes me look at something differently, sometimes it offers a new perspective from what my friends and I chat about, and sometimes it's just pure comedy. I don't expect people to agree with me I know I'm right all of the time, and with everything I it infinite knowledge rebellion or whatever, but I always kind of marched to my own drum beat, or rather my theme songs that play in my head when I walk into a room. That being said, I do appreciate and love some all comments, suggestions, dialogue and other points of views. However, if it's an attack on be prepared for my now pms, vodka induced, lack of dick response.  Feel free to comment!

Response In Question...

@ Anonymous - WTF???? Hold on, let me re-phrase that... WHAT THE FUCK??? Clearly, you aren't a follower of the blog, and I respect that, as well as your opinion. However, how many posts have you actually read? How many e-mails have you sent or questions have you asked?

You clearly, clearly, clearly, don't know what the fuck you are talking about...If you are trying to make a point, it's lost. If you are referring to a guy, that I'm sprung off...who could it possible be, that was mentioned here? Brian??? We've never had sex, Mr. Henry, we've known each other for 8/9 years now. The Old Man...nope never horizontally tangled with him. Tony??? I've known him for over a year...

Yes, I've had sex with other guys, but in no way, shape or form do I think sex is going to keep a man. If I CHOOSE TO HAVE WILD, HEAD BOARD BANGING SEX it's because I want to, and I USE PROTECTION...

I've never used sex to gain favors or give favors... or anything, maybe you should read everything before passing JUDGMENT on me...then if you still feel the same way...put a stick up your ass...(as Brian says...respect mon)

However. I do appreciate your comment and hopefully I answered some questions for other people who may have been curious...keep em' coming... I so do appreciate the candidness