Tuesday, September 29, 2009

My Yoga Pants Must Be Sexy

This is like the fourth, fifth, sixth time I've been accosted either on my way to my Pilates class, or leaving my Pilates class. Tonight, while I was in my happy place, this guy approached me. First, I'm all sweaty, looking like I just finished a marathon and ten-hour romp session, walking home, yoga mat in hand, still being "centered" and guy (to be named later) stops me, not in a good way. Second, he tries to relate to me and tells me that he takes yoga, and proceeds to name all of the classes he's taken.

Ok, dude. I don't care. I'm hungry, sweaty, and I was in my happy place. See, the thing is, I felt like he was stalking following me, because he came from out of nowhere, and just kind of rolled up on me like he was the FBI.

So he asks to call. (Side Note: I was feeling all of the red flags beginning to slowly rise :End Side Note)

Thirty minutes later he sends his first text.

Yep. My inital assesment of his approach was on point. His name should be Mr. Red Flag. Not only did he not allow enough time for me to shower, eat, watch Heroes, which I missed anyways because I thought it came on at 9pm and not at 8pm, he came off as being el desperate. Like dude.

He then commits another cardinal sin or...well it should be one. Here's the text:

Mr. Red Flag: What are three things men like about ur personality, and three things men like about you physically"

Really? Really? Well he clearly liked the way my yoga pants fit ever so snuggly and he liked how my t-shirt was just a bit sweaty....

Not only did I not answer his stupid ass question. He's already earned the time-out box award. "Go immediately to the time-out box, do not pass go, do not collect your vodka shots"..... TOOL


Journey to my soul said...

What the F* kind of question is that? Damn...these dudes need to sharpen up their game.

Anonymous said...

dang men are giving out quizzes now?
i don't like those intro. convos. and that is just like a survey. you still giving out your number diva come on now. haha

p.s. of course a woman leaving the gym is hot. unless she needs to spend a lot more time in there.

Ms.Minx said...

LMAO...Yup, that's all I got, Diva..nothing else!! LOL

Tunde said...

are you serious? 30 minutes later? where do you find these guys or better yet where do they find you? hilarious.

BFrank84 said...

LOL he probably got a questionnaire ready and all....smh@ the wacky wackness

BlkBond said...

I like yoga pants, lets me know you got somewhere to go or things to do.

Like, I'm more likely to holla if I see a girl in running shoes rather than sandals. I guess instinctively, I figure she has somewhere to be, in a hurry (lol). Also, because I don't like feet, on the Marcus Graham level.(laughs).

I do not like quizzes either, lol. What the hell? This is just further indication that a manual is needed.


True2me said...

umm...yep. Mr. Red Flag is accurate. Sounds like my Date Dude..Eff outta here. WTF

Anonymous said...

Stop the madness....quit giving your number out LOL


Chaotically Calm said...

LMAO at Mr Red Flag...good for you on the none answer. He probably had another questionnaire all lined up for you once you answered the preliminary round.

Anonymous said...

Why are you so hard on dudes? Give a nigga a chance at least. Nothing wrong with the question he asked. Hell, He was just trying to get to know you. Guys never even have a chance with you because of your overanalyzing a situation. Lighten up

Also, I find it funny how ALL of your readers responses all seem to agree with you....ALL the time. lol

Step outside the box people. ;)

Beer Drinker said...

I bet you looked hot! And this dude seems to be a little overzealous. I've never dated in the text/email era, but I'm also only 37, so not a grandfather or anything.

If you're not remotely interested, don't give your number. Give your local police precinct number instead.

Yes, the quiz was stupid. It should've been "Can I call you later" but your hotness probably distracted him.

DaddysFishBowl said...

LMAO @ the "time out box" this dude is uber lame, can't believe he texted you a survey.

the Coach said...

I personally would like to see you in the downward BAD Doggie position....Were they Victoria Secret Low riders.....ha ha ha

The Coach