Just Another Manic Monday...

Damn, I wish it were Friday.

I'm a bit self destructive when I'm bored. Today was the first day in a long time that I didn't have anything planned with anyone. No going out, no showing guests around, no working...just nothing. I couldn't even entertain myself with TV, because it's been so long since I followed a show. Couldn't entertain myself with the internet, or finishing my application to grad school. Instead, I entertained my afternoon/night with men...

The first victim on the list. Mr. Henry. I was feeling nostalgic this weekend and thought about some of the good times. There was this one time, Mr. Henry was dancing (a little strip teasing) for me, and I was throwing quarters at him and he would pick them up and put them in his pocket. It was hilarious!!! I called him today. He has a deep, soothing sexy voice that I used to listen to every night when he was a radio personality back in college. I just wanted to hear it for a second. We talked for a minute. He's said he would take me to dinner this week for a belated birthday celebration. I DON'T think that's a good idea. I haven't seen him since October, and I don't want to fall back into Old (bad) habits...

The second victim was none other than the Old Man (old reliable) I was cooking dinner, and not paying attention to what I was doing. I called him to talk to him because he's always so UPBEAT. He didn't disappoint. However, he did ask me a few hard questions, that I still haven't answered...one being "Why Am I With Him". I asked him one too. "What do you want from me"?. No questions were answered tonight. I guess it's about that time...

The third and final victim because I am a glutton for punishment (mutilation) was... Tony. I haven't brought myself to watch the movie we watched together again, although it's my fav and I found the soundtrack this weekend. I know I said I wasn't going to call him, but a few things provoked me to call. 1) I'm horny and he was the last person I had sex with, 2) The band I saw last night reminded me of him 3) I'm bored 4) I was listening to the soundtrack and avoiding the grad application...so any excuse to occupy a few minutes. Our conversation was weird...not in sync, I don't know. He asked to see me, and I said "eeehhh".

Damn, I need SOME, but NONE of the above will do, and I don't want to BED anyone new yet. I'm NOT jumping on the celibate bandwagon (yet) and toys and self gratification just DOESN'T do it for me...damn, what's a girl to do??? Who's a girl to do???

Nostalgic

I was feeling really nostalgic last night. I wanted to talk to my Island Prince...really bad. I don’t know why. It was like something came over me. I tried calling him but a French operator came on. I sent him an e-mail and sent his brother a text.

Island Prince e-mailed me back with his new number.

I called him, the conversation was short but sweet. He wanted to know when I was going to come and see him…anytime he wants. We couldn’t really talk because of the static and background noise, but…the few minutes satisfied my craving.